So I've noticed something and I felt that it was imperative for me to share it with you. Peer pressure might be bad and all but what about pressure from those closest to us? Family. We have to deal with constant pressure, especially from our parents, as teens. As a 16 year old girl a lot of expectations are held over my head.
What is so bad about family pressure and why is it not addressed as much as peer pressure? Its quite simple...family pressure isn't considered as much of a bad thing as peer pressure because it usually involves a positive outcome. We get pressurised by family to become what they want us to be, and that is good, wholesome, top-achieving members of society. That is, of course, unless your parents are grooming you to become a drug dealer.
Unfortunately, family pressure does affect teens negatively. Depression, suicide, cutting...all these could be caused by the constant nagging from parents for their children to become successes in life. Its not a bad thing to want that for your child but there is a limit. You can send your child to every class available for dance, but if your child is uninterested, or simply cannot dance, you cannot, or should not, force your child to continue on a downward spiral of nothing.
We sit around with millions of dreams as we grow up. I have many dreams that I wish to accomplish but I also realise that had it been my parents idea, I wouldn't be as interested. This is because we want different things and I want to be able to have my own dreams. I refuse to be held back by my parents interpretations and that is why I have my own set of dreams. Yes, going to university in two years time is a good goal from my parents, but it should be down to me whether or not I actually go and where I will go.
Our parents do want so much for us, but sometimes its just not our vision of our future. I grew up to be independent, to pave my own path, and let no one tell me what I can and cannot do. I also needed to know when I need help and where to ask. That isn't pressure but when they have a goal that is forced upon you, like my dad's deep need for me to go into IT, its not okay. I know my dad will be happy either way, but what if he had been insistent? I would have died! I cant handle the thought of someone else controlling my future.
While I may have academic freedom, I will admit that I have been pressured in other aspects. Religion, for instance. I live in a rigid Christian home and was baptised into the church earlier this year. Unfortunately, I sometimes feel forced. I sit around doubting my beliefs on a daily basis but I'm too afraid to admit that to my parents. I didn't even want to be baptised but the pressure from them was too great and I caved in and got baptised. I regret it still, and I always will.
I feel that had I been allowed to wait till I felt ready, maybe my baptism would have meant more to me, but because of my parents, I'm a baptised Christian with little faith and a hell of a problem. I didn't even feel excited to be baptised and it meant little to nothing to me. I get so sad just thinking about it.
The point of this blog post was just to finally let out how I feel about this. Family pressure is a very important topic to me and I feel that I needed to express myself. I hope I didn't depress you too much :)
Till next time
xoxo
